Robot Wars S07E03 Part 3: Over And Out

Yes, I know it’s been a while. Unfortunately I’ve been rather busy. But hey, that’s life for you. Anyway…


So we already know that Dantomkia are through to the heat final, but they need somebody to face. That’ll either be King B Powerworks or IG-88; Pusher/lifter or vertical spinner. Two very different kinds of robots. King B just about managed to scrape through in their initial melee- which included Dantomkia- whilst IG-88 pretty much dominated theirs.

We can preface this next battle with the fun fact that IG-88 couldn’t actually move past the first part of the arena in their melee due to poor radio reception. Now they have a rather wonderful and makeshift replacement that supposedly gives them more range. We’ll see about that…

Shunt and Bash will hopefully be shunting and bashing the competitor robots to death as our resident HRs for this battle. And we’re ready to begin!
Naturally, King B spends the early exchanges trying its best to avoid the spinning blade of IG-88, doing everything in its power to drive away from the other robot. IG-88 is a weird contraption, because to drive weapon first I’m pretty sure that means you have to do everything in reverse. It looks that way anyway. IG-88 do get a hit in though, but doesn’t seem to do too much. It’s a start.

King B though is still going with the same strategy though, which is pretty much just to run away and hope that the blade doesn’t catch it in any way, shape or form. Basically, Floyd Mayweather in robot form. King B is not only on the run, but looking fairly slow and lethargic. IG-88 isn’t doing much to help its chances though. At least, not until King B finally decides to drive straight into the disc, bounces up into the air, and then lands with as much grace as half a brick and drives into the arena side wall.

Flying King.png
Goddamn spotlight ruining the goddamn picture
The Spark Man.png
The spark bot

After about 6 replays of that one moment, just from different angles, we’re back to the action. Well, I say action. There isn’t really any, because that one hit has completely knocked King B Powerworks out of commission. IG-88 goes in for a closer look, not that it’s needed, and King B promptly starts venting smoke. Smoke that I’m fairly certain isn’t supposed to be coming out of the robot. Refbot comes in and counts out King B, just adding to the misery for the robot.

The big smoke.png
The big smoke

Shunt then comes in for a few bites at the King B armour, but the axe is not actually powerful enough to penetrate. So with Shunt accepting defeat, Sgt Bash comes in and takes over, taking King B by the crushing jaw and going straight through the armour like a serrated knife through rather soft butter.

Crunch.png

After some backwards and forwards, King B gets placed onto the floor flipper, and flung high into the air. They land upside down, which is made more entertaining by the fact their lifting forks are jammed upwards, so they really land on those. Either way, eventually King B conspire to finish in the pit, and they’re gone.

So now we know our heat final. The spinning wonder of IG-88 or the flipping fantastic Dantomkia? Dantomkia have already taken damage from a spinner in their earlier battle, but if IG-88 are flipped over then it’s game over. It could be a close one.

Your house robots are Shunt and Dead Metal. Let’s get this heat final underway!

*2 seconds later*

And it’s over, Dantomkia have won!

I mean it wasn’t 2 seconds, but I’m not joking. Straight from the off, with IG-88 trying to manoeuvre themselves so that they can get a hit in, Dantomkia get underneath, drive them all the way to the arena sidewall, and send them toppling over the side! It’s over as easily as that.

Dantomkia are fucking ruthless.

Over and Out 2.png
Over and Out

And that ends your heat. Bit of an anticlimax? Very good driving, control and weapons use form Dantomkia nonetheless. They look a force to be reckoned with. I’ll see you next time in Heat D, hopefully this time without the week long break between articles.

Until then….

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